Usernames and Perception: Be careful how you present yourself.

Usernames are really important, but can be easy to develop.

For instance: ready4U, maddawg, cupcakes49

Here's the 411 on usernames:  You want to pick one that either defines you, something about you, or something you find interesting.

What you don't want is a description that might scare people off.  I saw one that had a description of something from that 50 Shades series.  1) I have never read the series; 2) am not interested in reading the series and 3) since I have an idea of what the series entailed (I watched the 20/20 special with the author), I wouldn't date anyone that had any mention to that series.

I actually reported the member for an offensive username and recommended to the dating site that he might be better suited for one of those more adult sites.

I've seen some that make sense, some that don't, and some that really put me off.  Usernames really set the initial impression.  If it's your initials and your birth year, great, easy.  If it's "Horror911,"  help the man that posts that (I made it up, I haven't actually seen it yet).

I am very cautious when I see usernames.  I read them at least twice to see if I can make sense of it.  If I can't figure it out, that's fine, but if it is something I can figure out and it seems lewd, I will go no further with that profile- whether it is to read it, contact it, connect with it, etc.  I simply don't want someone who is willing to post their dirty mind in a first impression.  One of the double entendres I saw was "Perfectus Erectus" - first time through I went "ew," second time I read it, I was thinking that it could go two ways... either the latin "Homo Erectus" bit or something else that I will not post here. 

One statement on this "Perfectus Erectus" username- This profile was presented to me on a type of Tinder format of a dating website- Do you want to meet this person or not? click on the yes if you want to meet them.  Once you click yes, and the other person clicks yes, then it takes a few more steps to meet them.  I never saw the profile, never saw the username, until we were matched.  I got a text in my account that this person wanted to meet me, and I had to go to the profile to find out what on earth did I do to select this person.  I found out the part of the program where we were matched, and it clearly wasn't where I could view the username and profile.  I have never contacted him and vice versa.  I was too put-off to be minutely interested. 

Mine for instance is a flower and my birth date day.  I won't post it here, because I don't want a ton of people searching for me, but it's easy to read, puts a positive vibe out there and I like seeing some of the nicknames that people post for me.  Other girl nicknames out there that I've seen are like "Cupcake" "Cat-eyes" "Blue Eyes" and "Cookieloo." For Guys, some of the easier ones I have figured out are "RoyallyUnique" "Looking4realdeal" and "Blueeyes411" (some of these are real, some are not).  I like something that tells me something about you.

The ones I am wary of, in guy terms (cause that's all I look at) are: anything that has "420" in the username, "a ____dating website_____ user,"  the obvious 50 shades mention, "vigorous" anything, "fierce"- unless it has a better connotation than like fiercely romantic or something of that nature, confederate comments "SouthernConfed" or "Starsandbars," anything racial regardless of color, and anything that refers to anything other than the person involved. 

Note on the dating website user username:  To me, I think it lacks imagination in regards to coming up with your own material, and to me it lacks integrity by introducing yourself to the community who is making an effort to put themselves out there to introduce themselves to you.

I love guys that put their interests, their work, or their hope for the process out there.  I really like to see what kind of person posts their picture and username with imagination, and purpose. 

There are websites that can help suggest usernames if you are lacking in the imagination department, but I highly recommend not using anything that would draw the wrong crowd.  If you want a niche crowd, you need to look for a dating website that has that particular niche.  And that's about all I'm going to say about the "niche" department. 

Spelling. I am big on grammar, spelling, slang and gender usage.  Pay attention to how you want to project who you are.  If you are using something that someone has to look up on urbandictionary.com to get the gist of, chances are you overshot.  If you use something that is gang related, offensive, or something else that is derogatory, directive in that manner, or identifies you as something that would be "thuglife" and don't intend it to be such, look it up before it becomes your final username.  "Dawg" is one of those I really can't stand.  Randy Jackson on "American Idol" used it a lot, A LOT. So for me, it's a major deterrent, because that's not what I want to represent in my life- a poorly spelled boys club (not a racist or derogatory term, I am simply stating this to make a point).  The other end of that, I don't want to see anything related to drugs.  "420" really puts me off, once I figured out what it was (yes, I had to have someone explain it to me).  Other things- If a man puts "Female" in his username like "looking4gudfemale"- I'm out.  Last I checked that was my gender only.  Women prefer to be defined as "Ladies or women" rather than by our gender.  I was always taught to treat people as I would want to be treated.  I refer to women as ladies and men as gentlemen, until you prove yourselves otherwise.  Everyone deserves a bit of respect and treating them as if they should be in a higher social status than they currently are, unless they prove themselves otherwise.  (and trust me, I have people who prove themselves otherwise all the time.)

Have fun developing your username, just be careful how you present yourself.  First impressions are everything.  Make it a good one.